Nottinghamshire FC Fanzine

	Barking At The Moon
	The Unofficial Fanzine of Nottinghamshire FC

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Geordie Temperature Scale

So how hard are the blokes from the North East??
50 DEGREES	Southerners turn on the heating. People in Newcastle plant their gardens.
40 DEGREES	Southerners shiver uncontrollably. People in Newcastle sunbathe.
35 DEGREES	Southern cars will not start. People in Newcastle drive with the windows down.
20 DEGREES	Southerners wear coats, gloves and wool hats. People in Newcastle throw on a T-shirt (girls start wearing mini skirts.)
15 DEGREES	Southerners begin to evacuate. People in Newcastle go swimming in the North Sea.
ZERO DEGREES	Southern landlords turn up the heat. People in Newcastle have the last barbecue before it gets cold.
MINUS 10 DEGREES	Southerners cease to exist. People in Newcastle throw on a lightweight jacket.
MINUS 80 DEGREES	Polar bears wonder if it's worth it. Boy scouts in Newcastle start wearing long trousers.
MINUS 100 DEGREES	Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. People in Newcastle put on their long johns.
MINUS 173 DEGREES	Alcohol freezes. People in Newcastle become frustrated because the pubs are shut.
MINUS 297 DEGREES	Microbial life starts to disappear. The cows on Newcastle Town Moor complain about vets with cold hands.
MINUS 460 DEGREES	All atomic motion stops. People in Newcastle start to stamp their feet and blow on their hands.
MINUS 500 DEGREES	Hell freezes over. Sunderland qualify for Europe.

Barking At The Moon