Howl Left

Barking At The Moon

Howl Right
The Unofficial Fanzine of Nottinghamshire FC


  Slang Alphabet

 
1
MYSTERY BUS
The bus that arrives at the pub on Friday night while you're in the toilet after your 10th pint, and whisks away all the unattractive people so the pub is suddenly packed with stunners when you come back in.
2
MYSTERY TAXI
The taxi that arrives at your place on Saturday morning before you wake up, whisks away the stunner you slept with, and leaves a 10-Pinter in your bed instead.
3

NBR (No Beers Required)
Someone that you'd chat up instantly in the pub. The opposite of a 10-Pinter.

4
NELSON MANDELA
Rhyming Slang for 'Stella' (the lager).
5
ONE IN THE DEPARTURE LOUNGE
The need to defecate imminently.
6
PEARL HARBOUR
Cold (weather). An example of it would be - "It's a bit Pearl Harbour out there!"
Meaning - there's a nasty 'nip' in the air.
7
PICASSO ARSE
A woman whose knickers are too small for her, so she looks like she's got 4 buttocks.
8
RAGMAN'S COAT
Untidy and unkempt pubic hair e.g. "That mumbler looks quite fit but I bet she's got a kebab like a ragman's coat!"
9
RELEASE A CHOCOLATE HOSTAGE
To defecate e.g. "I've got one in the departure lounge, so I'm just nipping out to release a chocolate hostage".
10
SALAD DODGER
An excellent phrase for an overweight person.
11
SKIN-CHIMNEY - see BADLY PACKED KEBAB
12
SPERM WAIL
A verbal outburst during the male orgasm.
13
STARFISH TROOPER or ARSETRONAUT
A homosexual.
14
SWAMP-DONKEY
A deeply unattractive woman.
15
TART FUEL or BITCH PISS
Bottled Alcopops, e.g. Hooch, regularly consumed by young women and Mitch!!
16
TEN-PINTER
Someone that you'd only chat up after drinking at least 10 pints.
17
TITANIC
A lady who goes down first time out.
18
TODGER DODGER
A lesbian.
19
TWO-BAGGER or DOUBLE BAGGER
Someone that you'd need 2 paper bags to have sex with
(1 to cover their head, and 1 to cover yours, in case their bag falls off).
20
UP ON BLOCKS
Menstruating i.e. out of action, a bit like a car in a garage.
e.g. "Don't think I'll be in luck tonight lads, the missus is up on blocks".
21
VAGINA DECLINER
A homosexual.
22
WALLACE AND GROMIT
Rhyming Slang for 'vomit'.
23
WANK SEANCE
During a masturbation session, the eerie feeling that your dead relatives are watching you with disgust.
24
WYNONA RYDER
Rhyming Slang for 'cider'. e.g. "Pint of Wynona, half a Nelson and a bottle of tart fuel please Doreen".
25
X-PILES
Unwanted visitors from Uranus.

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