Barking At The Moon

Sunday morning, wake up, excitement grows.

Day starts well. we should be meeting for 10.30 at Meadow Lane. I arrive at 10.25 at Paul Rudd's house. He's at his Birds. (does this explain why he was knackered throughout the day??) Get to Meadow Lane for 10.55. Only Dave there, "We kick off in 5 mins lads, where's the rest" "Fuck knows" comes the reply. It turns out Kip, Mark, Brent and Rich are all in Texaco garage getting energy drinks and pies. (fat bastards).

Give in our team name with a minute to spare. Inter Women (they eventually get the joke)

So we start getting changed by the side of the pitch and our only warm up and stretch is tying our boots.
We take a look around at the other 17 teams. Shit lads they look good.

Game 1:- V's S Turtle.
Couldn't be an easier start. Last years Champs. Game starts well as Rudd takes 3 mins to score the first. 1-0. on 5 Neil comes on gets the ball and gives it to their Fat, Bald striker. Neil feels like a prize twat. 1-1. 2 mins to go Rudd restores the lead with a well taken finish.
Result 2-1 Notts. Rudd (2)

Game 2:- V's Arnold Masters.
Hmmmm, masters, not really. We take a stroll in the park whooping them 3-0. Our 6-a-side specialists Mark Sissons and Brent Fairbanks grab the goals. solid at the back too.
Result 3-0 Notts. Fairbanks (2), Sissons.

Game 3:- V's Millhouse Reddington.
These guys came all the way from Wakefield but set the scene when in an earlier game one guy went for a pass and stood on the ball prompting Nigel to remark "oh my god, we're gonna win this, piece of piss". This proved to be our toughest game but if not for some wasted chances we could have done them.
Result 0-0.

Game 4:- V's TFT Mammories.
And they played like their name suggests, a bunch of tits. Another convincing win as Mark took his chances well scoring 3 goals. Richard Shaw had a solid one in defence with Neil and Nigel all helping with the goals. It was staring to look like Kip had wasted his entrance fee. He didn't even notice when a shot hit his post. way to keep alert Kip !!!
Result 3-0 Sissons (3)

Game 5:- V's Burnett.
Started tough. didn't think we'd break the deadlock but after being put through and missing a golden opportunity Neil missed a sitter only to get a penalty as he was stopped by a defender in the area. Brent stepped up to score with ease. After his earlier miss Neil scored what was to be a true beauty. Rudd put a free kick into a narrow position and Neil belted the ball into the roof of the net.
Result 2-0 Neil Buxton, Fairbanks

This result saw us comfortably into the semi's with the best record out of the 3 leagues of 6.
13 points out of 15. maybe a career in management for Neil yet!!

Had an hour before the semi to be played so a few went off and got more pies and crisps and chocolate.
We were all feeling really knackered by now but no-one wanted to miss the semis.

SEMI FINAL:- V's Sneinton Stars.
The game was a tight affair with neither team really threatening to score. With Sissons being put through, only to bottle it, we had the best chance. He took the ball wide on the right and let rip with a cracking shot witch hit the keeper, the bar, the post and then spun out to safety. With Dave Smith blocking everything at the back they really had no chance of scoring. The nerves were starting to build up when the final whistle went as the game headed straight for penalties. We won the toss and took the first penalty.
Firstly Brent scored then Dave, Mark and Paul all followed. All converting with ease. it was 4 all out of 4 penalties with one a piece left. Neil asked Nigel and Rich if either of them wanted to take the next one. "No" and "fuck that" were the answers. So Neil stepped up and asked the lads "left foot or right?" Followed by some boos from the Sneinton team. It didn't matter as it was slotted away nicely. Their Lad stepped up for the final kick. You could see the nerves were weighing on his shoulders. He placed the ball and waited for the whistle. He struck it well towards the bottom corner. Damn, we thought, sudden death, but suddenly, to our delight, this was the first we were to see of Kip as he sprawled across goal to save the spot kick easily. Mucho celebrations followed, as we never thought we'd get this far.

FINAL: - V's Kimberly Bromley.
Straight into the Final then as there was no rest. The idea around this game was that we had got this far so we thought even 2nd place was OK. We were relaxed about this game. They looked impressive, young and skilful, in particular their two front men. Dave took one and Rich took the other. (But that's a different story, I mean marked).

They were passing fluently but just could not get the break through. Kip was getting really bored by now, a whole day with nothing to do. Suddenly their skinhead striker took the ball wide on the left and cracked a shot. It flew into the side netting. This was a let off for us but proved to be the wake up call we needed. On about 5 minutes the ball was being knocked around the middle of the park and was somehow squeezed through to Mark. He took the ball under control and slotted home the goal. 1-0. After this lead it was our turn to put them under pressure with Brent unleashing a fierce thunderbolt which had us all celebrating a bit too prematurely as it struck off the underside of the bar only to bounce onto the line. A couple of minutes later Neil was put through only to find the keepers legs denying us a two goal lead.

The game was in the closing minutes and they had the pressure again looking for an equaliser. They had us on the back foot. Continually getting free kicks and throw ins around the box. They put all their men forward in a desperate attempt to get that goal. Then suddenly another free kick on the edge of our box led to a goal. They played it out to their classy lanky striker who controlled the ball lined up to shoot and....... lost the ball. It was knocked forward to our man Mark who was on his own about 10 yards from their goal. Shouts of "The goal hanging bastard" and "where the fuck did he come from" rang round but he didn't care. We didn't care. Only they cared because Mark made no mistake in bagging his second and putting us 2-0 up. The remainder of the game pitted out as we stole the show to win the Notts county 6-a-side tournament on our first attempt.

They trudged off with their heads down as we jumped and celebrated our fine victory.

A superb show from Kip, Nigel, Dave, Neil, Rich, Paul, Brent and Mark all helping the team to winning the trophy.

Photos were taken and trophies were handed out. The only thing missing was the walk up to the Queen's balcony.

Look out for us in the Notts County programme next season.

Inter Women celebrating their success.

Goals: -
Total Scored: 12
Total Conceded : 1
Mark Sissons (6)
Brent Fairbanks (3)
Paul Rudd (2)
Neil Buxton (1)